Wasting Eleven Plus Time

Your eleven plus child has promised to forswear any use of any games console for the duration of the eleven plus. This is not a sanction that you brought about – it is simply your child responding to the market forces of the eleven plus. Pleas of: “All work and no play” fall onto deaf ears. Your child needs to mature and settle down to serious and sustained effort.

This jargoned approach to the problem of encouraging your child to work in an environment of endeavour and ennoblement requires some toys to be hidden until the examination is over. “Do we really have to throw away my Wii? We only bought it at Christmas?”

“No dear, we are `lending’ it – with the sports pack – to Auntie Harry. She wants to try to get her weight down and I know that you really want to work hard this year. You will get it back again after the examination. We are only going to discard your old games consoles.”

“Oh mother, I do know how to cope with the re-cycling element.”

“First of all we have to decide if my old consoles have reached the end of their useful life.

We also need to go to our local Recycling Centre to see their permits or licences from the Environment Agency.

We need to make sure that we are able to have proof of what happens to the consoles after their disposal.

I am sure that the batteries will be dealt with properly. We don’t want any hazardous waste.”

“Look dear. It is not worth the effort. Just keep playing your games. We won’t interfere with you. We can do your eleven plus work nearer to the examinations.”

“Oh Mum!!